Friday, 21 December 2012

Sucking out the creativity

Recently I did an online assignment where I was forced to gut a poem of all it's meaning, then stitch in my own words. This goes against so many of my moral codes as an artist. Although I do enjoy watching a parody now and again, this took it to the extreme.

I don't like it, it felt like plagiarism. It's like a colouring book, no matter how creative you are your work either ends up, pretty much the same, or you get shot down with bad marks. Why isn't the art form of writing taken seriously enough? I'm pretty sure that my friends who frequent the art room would be annoyed to have to paint over a colouring book.

If you change the words a bit, you cam become Shakespeare.

Since I thought it was funny, here is the poem made:

How do you do?
No, I don't play basketball
No, not rugby either
No, I am not a full time ceiling painter
No, I didn't grow 50 centimetres this year
Yeah, my hair and height do make me resemble Andre the Giant in a way
Actually this helmet is for cycling, not in case of low doorways
What do I want to be?
A filmmaker, or maybe a screenwriter
I understand, they do make plenty of money in sports
Actually the air is really good up here, very fresh
My height? Around two meters, about 199 centimetres, last I checked
What? Why would you need to know how many feet? We live in Canada
Fine, Six feet and a half
Wow, your cousin's son is a few inches shorter than me? That's nice
No, I don't buy my shoes on the internet
No, buying a car isn't too difficult
What's the trick? Maybe it's the well water

This is a blatant rip off of Sure you can ask me a Personal Question by Diane  Burns. I hate copying.When people ask me if I want to become the next Spielberg, my response is no. Spielberg already exists, people spend money to see his films, they already have him. If all films were Spielberg films, they would get boring fast. I would rather become the first Anton Seaman. The boy who directed blockbusters out of highschool. That obviously won't happen, but my films will certainly stand out because they are mine.

It is weird how unoriginality can be encouraged in an English class. At least they aren't teaching me how to set up a blog, I obviously know that already,I learned it myself, and upload original material I solely created.

Monday, 10 December 2012

It is Almost Christmas

Christmas is coming right around the corner. In a couple weeks I will be caught up in the festivities, but until then, I find myself lamenting anything  related to it. I wonder why so much attention is given to this particular holiday, I don't see any Thanksgiving advertisements in the month of September, or Valentines day commercial in January. Why all the advance planning? Sure, the festivities may take a few days to run their course, but isn't it just like Easter? An excuse for the family to meet?

At an earlier age I had it down to this; "Christmas is like thanksgiving, your birthday, and spring break combined, you sit around for a few weeks drinking egg nog, playing your new video games with your cousins, while not caring about anything.

Today, it seems way too obvious. The tradition of gift giving has been poisoned by the commercialization. I would totally negate it's benefits, if i weren't a jobless filmmaker, who depends on this ability to acquire a collection of amazon gift cards, so that I may have equipment. I can predict that once I get a job that allows me to purchase these things that are essential for my livelihood, I'll say "screw it, I don't need presents, half this stuff I won't use. If I go to University, however, my list would include things like food (a thing I hear many students go without).

Until Christmas break comes I will complain every time I see anything related to it. Why? Because humbug.

Friday, 7 December 2012


To the few people that read my blog, and expected a post on Wednesday, I apologize. I was busy, very busy shadowing at SHAW. I am becoming a volunteer so that I may learn about professional camera operation. Not only that but I have lately been sick. You know what is amazing? A scene from 2001 syncs very well with Echoes by Pink Floyd. That is likely the best thing ever.

Monday, 3 December 2012

Online Interactions

For my schooling, my main courses are taught through a program called "Selfdesign". Selfdesign is an online learning platform based out of Vancouver that allows me to learn independently of any annoying peers I may have. As I have stated before, most of the people who I would be in class with are either stupid, or so immature that I cannot bear their presence. Those who are the exception to this rule I will call "Intelligent Human Beings". This is merely the term I will be using, and is not meant to demean any of the other students.

My early life was not really that bad, to say that it wasn't absolutely unpleasant is untrue. Most of the time I would be stuck in a class I hardly cared about, lamenting the work. But in grade 9, I had the extreme pleasure of using these online tools for the first time.

What I originally expected, and what I continue to expect  from these online learning tools, is a way in which I can get these classes off my back in the most painless way possible. The developers clearly had a totally different idea. The site is hardly intuitive or user friendly, unless you come from the 90s. Some modules don't even work in Google Chrome, the most widely used browser today. It seems to be optimized for Internet Explorer, which "Intelligent Human Beings" never use.

Usability aside, the thing I most despise is; the encouragement of student interaction. Being socially active is a great way to not become an insanely deprived psychopath , but this is ludicrous. I signed up for these courses so I wouldn't have to interact with people, and I could hang out with "Intelligent Human Beings" in my own time. 

I don't even know these people! I only know what they look like on the off chance they uploaded a proper profile picture. It is really hard to gauge someone on their written work, especially when they are minors. Finding "Intelligent Human Beings" is like needles in a hay stack. 

"No I don't want to read your stupid short story, I have read a couple from other students, and silently wept about the fate of our species for a whole hour. Go Away!"